Ask Remabulous is back: How can you get the most out of coaching?

OK. I've gotten my head out of the clouds of the election and am back to the task at hand. This week's question comes from a member of the amazing incubator from Ladies Who Launch that I have been participating in for the last three weeks. I'm so sad it ends this Saturday. If you are a woman with a business or an idea for one, definitely check out this incredible resource. Here's how to find an incubator near you.

But on to our question:

Dear Ask Remabulous,

What is the best way to make sure you are getting what you can from a coaching session?  What should you ask the coach to gain a comfort level of their experience and knowledge in coaching for your needs?

Thanks!

Lady Who's Launching.

Dear Lady Who's Launching,

Thanks so much for your question. This is an important one, because a lot of people don't understand what qualifications a coach needs to have and what the advantages and purpose of good coaching is. I'll answer both of your questions below:

(I know this image, by phauly, is a bit out of focus, but it was too funny not to use.)

First I'll address the second part of your question. You're asking something essential here that clarifies something most people don't know: anyone can call themselves a coach at this point. That's right, anyone. So it is really important that you know who you are working with.

There are some certification programs that people can participate in in order to become a CPC, which stands for "certified professional coach." There are places like iCoach and IPEC and the Coaches Training Institute training programs who certify coaches. If you do online searching, you will find that there is a wide variety of training that goes into these programs. Some are nearly a year, some only thirty days, some are in person, some online. It makes sense that you'd be confused!

I am not a certified coach, which I am up front about with my clients. I have a three year clinical Master's Degree in Counseling Psychology and Expressive Arts, which included a supervised internship in private practice. While what I do isn't therapy, I draw from my therapeutic training all the time to fully understand where the client is coming from.

Which brings me to the main point: what you need to determine as a client is what you are entering coaching for. Is it to work on your business? Your relationships? Getting through planning a major event, like a wedding? Or dealing with an ongoing illness? (There are coaches who work in all of thes areas, and more) Once you know what you want to work on in coaching, it is easier to determine who you want to work with, and what skills you want them to have at their fingertips in order to help you.

A good indicator is a coach who allows you to have an informational session with him or her. You want to know what it is like to talk with this person and see how you feel discussing the issue you are going to be working on. The point is for you to feel motivated and excited to move forward as a result of this work, so see how you feel after speaking to the coach. Do you feel empowered? Ready to jump in? This, for me, is the best indicator that you've found the right person.

But don't be afraid to ask difficult questions. Ask them how they've helped other people in your situation, or what their general working method is and see if it makes sense to you. And see what your comfort level is with alternative types of qualification. Ask them if they have a degree that relates to their area of specialization if that matters to you, or would make you trust them more in your work together.

With that said, I have quite a few friends out in the world (Gwen, Tara, and Ingrid would be examples) whose expertise in their chosen area of work would make me trust them each instantly in their area of expertise, and I can't honestly say if any of them has a Master's Degree because it has never occured to me to ask them. I just know immediately that they know what they are talking about, and delight in taking any advice they dish out. If you have this feeling, I would trust it.

Once you have found your coach, the fun begins. What I have found with clients in general is that, as with most things, the more work and focus you put into your sessions and actions between sessions, the more you are going to get out of it. Now, I try to regulate clients who tend to do too much and burn out, or who find certain actions intimidate them even though they know they want to take them- a good coach will be able to help you out here. But your attention and investment in the process will have a huge impact.

Think about your session afterwards. Review what you went over and plan out the actions you committed to taking and then schedule them in during your week between sessions. This will help keep you in the flow. Also- I encourage my clients to e-mail me with an update about what they accomplished during the week before we have our session so the whole time isn't spent on reporting in what they got done. This is a huge time saver and gives you more time to spend with your coach on what's next.

And above all, don't be afriad to give feedback. If a method or approach isn't working for you, tell your coach. He or she can only benefit from this information and you can discover together what works for you. I always like to think of a coach as an athropologist: you are the one living the culture that is you, I'm just an observer brought in to help things run more the way you want them to. But when it comes down to it, you know yourself better than I do, and that knowledge is essential to the process.

Thanks so much for this question. I know this was a lot of imformatino in response, so I hope it was helpful. Let us know how you're doing and keep us posted!

Caroline