literaturelife

Baby Got Book (Sir mix-a-lot for readers)

A friend sent me this and it was too good not to share... for those of you who remember Baby Got Back, this is Baby Got Book:

Baby Got Book (based on the original by Sir Mix-A-Lot)

Spoken: "Oh. Mai. Gyawd, Becky, look at her book bag...she must be one
of those, like, Barnes & Noble's guys' girlfriends...it's so heavy...and
bulging...she's just so...SMART!"

I like big books and I cannot lie
You other brothers can't deny
That when a girl walks in with a fat Tolkien
And Cervantes in original tongue
You get sprung
Wanna read the spine
'Cuz you noticed that book was stuffed
Deep in the bag she's carrying
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh, baby, I wanna get wit' ya
And read your volumes
My homeboys tried to warn me
But with that book you got
Makes me so horny
Ooh, leather slipcase
You say you wanna get in my den
Well use it, use it, 'cuz you ain't that average reader

I've seen her readin',
It looks like Friedan,
She's smart,
Well-read, got it goin' with a great big head

I'm tired of magazines
Sayin' thin books are the thing
Take the average nerd guy and ask him that
She gotta pack much book

So fellas (yeah), fellas (yeah)
Has your girlfriend got the book? (Hell yeah!)
Tell her read it, read it, read it, read it, read it, read that hefty book
Baby got book

I like 'em hard and fat
And when I'm stockin' my flat
I just can't help myself
It's like Alexandria
Now here's my scandal

I wanna get you home
And uh, double up uh, uh
I ain't talkin' 'bout Pocket
'Cuz paperback books are made for boys
I wan' 'em real thick and verbose
So find that volume double
Boy am I in trouble
Beggin' for a piece of that Dickens
So I'm lookin' at Russian littin'
Fashion mag bimbos readin' like kids
You can have them bimbos
I'll keep my women like Oprah
A word 'bout the Bronte sistas
I wanna get wit' ya
I wanna English Lit ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna read
'Til the break of dawn

Baby got it goin' on
A lot of men won't like this song
'Cuz them punks like to illiterate it
But I'd rather hear you read
'Cuz I'm smart and I'm strong
And I'm down to get the fiction on

So ladies (yeah), ladies (yeah)
If you wanna read in my library (yeah)
Then lift it up
Stick it out
Even plain boys got to shout
Baby got book

Yeah baby
When it comes to females
Cosmo ain't got nothin' to do with my selection
Palahniuk, Fielding, Pynchon, too
And maybe a little Sartre

So your girlfriend drives a Rolls Royce
Playin' books on tape from James Joyce
But hearin' ain't like readin' in the back of her limo
My anaconda don't want none unless you got books, hon
You can read Cosmo or comics, but please don't lose that book
Some brothers wanna play that hard role
And tell you that the book ain't gold
So they toss it and leave it
And I pull up quick to retrieve it
So Cosmo says you're haughty
Well I ain't down with that
'Cuz you got Kierkegaard and your Nietzsche's kickin'
And I'm thinkin' bout stickin'

To the unread dames with the magazines
You ain't missin' a thing
Give me a sista I can't resist her
William Shakespeare didn't miss her
Some knucklehead tried to dis
'Cuz his girls were on my list
He had game but he chose to skip 'em
And I pull up quick to get with 'em
So ladies if the book is thick
And you wanna triple X throw down
Dial 1-900-mixalot, bring them Henry Miller thoughts
Baby got book

So. We're not the only ones talking about it.

Looks like we're not the only ones taking a peek at the onld fake memoir situation. The lovely Julia, of Book Soup, and my fellow Bay Area worshipper, had a few things to say on the matter over at the Book Soup blog.... check it out.

Gone With the Wind...Carol Burnett Style

There's nothing as fun and exciting as seeing your favorite book come to life visually, whether on television or in the movies. That is, as long as the adaptation is done well.

I came across a version of Margaret Mitchell's Gone With The Wind on youtube today, after reading an article from NPR about an African American woman who had read Gone With The Wind as a child and found herself enthralled by Scarlett O'Hara, despite the fact that Scarlett was a slave owner. Check that article by Karen Grigsby Bates out here.

That article had a link at the bottom to an old Carol Burnett skit, which is actually in two parts, but I'll lure you in with Part 1. It's done as only Carol Burnett could have done it:

Wow. BookCrossing shocker!

As a member of the website, bookcrossing, I am set up to receive little e-mail notices whenever someone "releases" a book. This basically means that when a member registers that they are going to leave a book, those in that general area get a message notifying them where the book will be. I get a ton of these and in general just delete them. They are usually notices that the latest bestseller is being left shortly in some cafe or other.

Just now, this gem caught my eye in my inbox: "[RELEASE ALERT] Los Angeles - Learn How To Enlarge Your Penis Naturally – Free Ebook Reveals What Really Works"

Now, this amazes me for a number of reasons. If this book is telling the truth, why on earth would you give it away? Why not save it for your whole life? But more bizarre to me is the thought that an e-book can be released. How? Is someone e-mailing it? Or did the releaser print it out and leave it at the location speicifed?

Questions, but no answers. Even so, it was too good not to share.

where have all the readers gone?

The Associated Press published a poll recently that states that one in four Americans read no books this past year. Kevin Salwen of Motto Magazine suggests that this is because we are now so focused on the internet instead as a source of information. In some cases, this may be true, especially those who are submerged in the blogosphere at all hours. (sometimes I think that the only reason I can still read books at all is because I work from home and spend "water cooler" time with books.) However, I am not certain that this is the case.

Why do we, as a culture, value books so much less than we used to? I am not talking about a "good old days when people walked ten miles through the snow to the library" kind of valuing, but rather a mental space that valued books a a source of discovery and expanded knowledge.

image: melyviz via flickr. (hopefully not a view we will see less of as people drop their books)

Literary Surprises

Written by Milda Harris

It was 6 in the morning and I was in an airport in Phoenix, flying back from Chicago and Blogher 2007 just in time to make it into work at 9 am in California, when I saw it. I was bleary eyed from lack of sleep, my eyes were red, I was exhausted from waking up at 3 am to get to the airport, and I had been trying to stay awake to catch my next flight by perusing the airport stores.   I was in the bookstore, where there's always a lot to look at, when I had a sudden surge of pure energy upon seeing one simple book on the bookshelf.

And, no it wasn't Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Although, that book is amazing in it's own right.

Reading in a Foreign Language

Posted by Milda Harris

When I was in high school, I used to hate having to try and read books in Spanish class or, a little more unusual for most people, Lithuanian class. It always seemed like the stories were boring, old, and unrelevant. I just wasn't interested and you really had to want to read them in the first place because they were just so difficult to understand.

Times have changed.

Words of Wisdom

Posted by Milda Harris

When in search for words of wisdom, I find myself searching the world wide web. I wasn't even searching for wisdom today and I was pleasantly surprised when I found some anyway on author Dean Koontz's website. He is an author whose books I used to devour, one after another. Lightning is the one I recommend, if you find yourself suddenly interested in him. It is my favorite of his books.

For those of you who have no clue who Dean Koontz is, he writes horror/supernatural/suspense/scifi type books for the most part. They're usually good, fun, scare-yourself-for-a-few-evenings reads. I stumbled across his website today, by the means of finding that there was a video contest to make a trailer for his latest book on youtube.  I thought this was pretty interesting from an author I recognized, so I went to his website to view the winning trailer.

The Inspiration of a Good Book

This is a REAL letter I received in 1990.

Posted by Milda Harris

One of the first novels I actually remember reading as a child is Charlie and the Chocolate Factory by Roald Dahl. I couldn’t put it down. I loved reading about Charlie’s adventures with the golden ticket and the chocolate factory. Then I discovered the old movie with Gene Wilder as Wonka. I loved that too! It was a great adaptation! I was even more thrilled when I found out the book had a sequel. So, I continued on and read Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator.

And, then it occurred to my twelve year old self – why didn’t they make a movie from Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator? That was an excellent book too! They had made a movie of the first one and that was really good. They should make a sequel! 

Picking the Perfect Book To Read On A Plane

Posted by Milda Harris

Taking a trip always has its stresses. First, you have to arrange the travel and the accomodations. Then you have to plan the events of the trip and as the days finally count down, you have to pack.

Once the clothes, toiletries, shoes, etc. are all in order in my suitcase, I still always find myself in a dilemma. Which book do I take with me to read on the plane? And, how do I choose only one?

Actually, I never choose only one. I just can't do it. I always bring at least two books, maybe three. When I was younger, I used to pack a backpack full of books for a week long trip. Books were like clothes to me. What if I wanted to read the one book I left behind? So, I brought them all. I would always have a stack of books to choose from.